A cycle of pressure
When a musician is hired for a job, a cycle of pressure begins involving the musician and the person who did the hiring (we'll call this person the boss):
First, the musician feels the pressure to do well to please the boss, to prove their worth, and to not let the boss down. The boss also has the ability to fire the musician, and that fear motivates the musician.
Second, the boss feels the pressure to promote and vouch for the musician they hired. They want to be seen as having made the right choice. They are now on the hook for their decision, and their reputation is on the line.
Feeling this pressure leads to our need to control and manage expectations, both for the musician and for the boss. And this pressure manifests in two common ways: sucking up (by the musician) and playing favorites (by the boss).
Even the best of us are only human. We are wired to want to belong. We want people to like us. These desires influence us to reciprocate. We reinforce people who reinforce us. We say nice things about people who say nice things about us. We return favors to those who were good to us and helped us.
This is the science of reciprocity, and it lubricates the cycle of pressure we feel. Musicians can feel obligated to feed egos and please bosses so they would be on their "good side" and likely receive positive rewards. Bosses can favor people who don't talk back, contradict, or judge - giving some people unqualified positive treatment.
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As a leader, it's hard to avoid playing favorites. Here is one way Marshall Goldsmith suggests leaders can avoid playing favorites as a leader.
Ask these 4 questions about the people you work with:
1. How much do (you think) they like you?
2, How much are they like (ie. similar to) you?
3. What is their actual contribution?
4. How much recognition do you give them?
Then reflect: How often is 4 because of 1 or 2, versus because of 3?
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This pressure between leader and subordinate in artistic workplaces has nothing to do with music making. And as leaders, just becoming aware of these dynamics can be so powerful.
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